#3. Focus on being positive; speaking and acting

By Mike Aux-Tinee…

Progress is funny, you take a couple of steps back before you can take some forward. I did not expect so much stress and anxiety over changing the words I used and the way I acted. But here I sit, trying to figure out why I am not experiencing success with this point in my happiness project.

All I wanted to do was:

  • learn to say less and use words that say more
  • avoid useless conversations
  • cut out being so critical in every conversation
  • work on my posture and appearance

While working to improve my speech, I discovered I speak rather fast. The faster I speak, the louder my voice gets. I guess I am trying to get everything out before I lose the other persons attention. I ended up stressing myself out. It never occurred to me to allow the conversation take a natural course; you say your point and then I say mine. Then sit back and enjoy the conversation.

So… while I am working to improve my speech, I am also reminding myself to speak slower and take my time. This should, in turn should help me keep my voice down to a dull roar.

I’ve noticed, so many people walk around in a semi catatonic state, struggling to make it through their day. They slouch, scuffle along and wear whatever they picked up off the floor that morning. For some reason, they have given up trying to take care of their appearance.

First impressions are made from your appearance. In an article I read about interviews, you have around thirty-sixty seconds to make a good first impression with the person you are meeting with. That person is mentally taking notes on your appearance, how firm your hand shake is and if you smile.

I need every advantage I can possibly get! It is time to break out the iron and press my shirts and khaki pants, shine my shoes, give a firm but not hand crushing hand shake and smile more. Maybe, I could wrangle a position in upper management by doing just those things. I could run into the owner of a professional sports franchise looking for a new employee and they are so impressed with me, offer me a job without reading my resume. Or maybe it would be nice to just walk around without looking like the rest of the zombie hordes that slug around all day. I think, that is more likely to happen than the others, well, some progress is better than none at all.

Peace Dudes!


2 thoughts on “#3. Focus on being positive; speaking and acting

  1. I just conquered the hand shake, I never knew it was that important and was never conscious of how hard or soft it was until I read it in a book. So the first time, this week, I was conscious of it and strangely enough, I got a better response than I had given the hand shake credit for. Funny that this happened to me and you wrote about its important today and I randomly came across your blog. Have a good one. Take care 🙂

    • I read a book by Dale Carnegie titled, How to Win Friends and Influence People. He talks about topics like, learning how to shake hands, how to influence someone by presenting your points and how to make friends at dinner parties. He weaves in personal stories with each point. I found it very easy to read and used a lot of the information in my own life. If you have some time, it could be worth your while.


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